Blog

What If You Don’t Know What You Want?

I’m realizing how common it is for people to think there’s something wrong with them if they don’t know what they want, in their work, their business, or their life.

I often hear things like this:

  • “I don’t have a clear goal or vision for my future, so I might be a hopeless case.”
  • “Other people just know what they want, but I’m not one of those people.”
  • “I’m trying to be self-employed but really I need to figure out what I actually like.”

I feel sad when someone thinks she is “a hopeless case.” In reality, lack of clarity on what you want is super common. It’s probably the norm!

But then, what to do?

[image - looking out wondering] Continue reading

Best Careers for Introverts, HSPs, and Other Sensitive Souls

Sensitive souls (including introverts, highly sensitive persons [HSPs], and people with big hearts) need to be careful about our work environments and career paths. We can really thrive and excel in the right environment, and we can wilt easily in the wrong environment.

If you have a yuck feeling about work, I bet it is because the work itself or the work culture are a bad match for you. You have so much to offer. Yes, YOU. The world needs your gifts. I mean it. You can find a better fit. Not overnight, but a better way is possible.

I’ve tried all kinds of work environments from classrooms to cubicles, and many kinds of careers, and now I have landed happily with being a self-employed coach.

In those various work experiences, sometimes I felt alive and energized and sometimes completely drained and MISERABLE. Oh I can feel the bad memories in my body as I write this. I want to reach out to you if you’re feeling that misery and beg you to believe it can be different.

I’ve studied what factors work for me and what works for others with a similar temperament.  Now I can fairly easily tell you what is important for us in choosing our work environments and career paths. Work can feel great, really! I’ll explain what you need to know.

[image - wondering where to go]

Continue reading

What If Your Career Ideas Feel Impossible?

Feeling stuck between staying or going, like the classic cat in the doorway syndrome? It doesn’t have to be so hard.

I hear people all the time stopping themselves from wanting what they want because they think it’s impossible or think it will be too big of a leap for them.

Don’t be tricked into thinking the devil you know is better than the one you don’t know. That idea comes from an inner skeptic voice that doesn’t have a corner on the truth.

It’s like that funny thing cats do when they cry to go outside but when you open the door, they freeze in the doorway, wondering whether to stay or go.

Making a change doesn’t mean you have to take a big leap. That’s a false notion.

So then what?  Continue reading

My 15 Favorite Books for Caring Introverted Women

[image of reading a book]Like many introverts, I love books. There’s so much richness in there! When I see a shelf of books, I see each book as a little world I can explore and savor.

I’m very picky about which books are worth reading. I start a lot of books, and put them down if they aren’t engaging or useful in some way.

When I find a book I love, I can get a bit evangelical about it. So, indulge me in my sharing some favorites that I think other caring introverted women will enjoy.  Continue reading

If you’re tired of hearing “Why are you so quiet?”

I have a fellow introvert friend named Emma who reminds me of me when I was younger, in all the good ways. Quiet, thoughtful, curious about everything, and adventurous in her own way. (Actually I wish I had been more like her brave self.)

She always raises such good questions, so I enjoy our email conversations about navigating our way in the world as introverts who want to have a say in things.

Often she asks questions that I hear many introverts asking. This particular question shown below is so classic. If you’re introverted, you have heard this many times:
“You’re so quiet” or “Why are you being so quiet?”

Sound familiar? It’s just one version of something that can be about looking down on our introverted nature.

So I asked Emma for permission to share our conversation here, and she said yes. It addresses a common concern for introverts in a way that felt so useful. I wanted to share it with you in case it helps you too.

Continue reading