Networking Secrets from an Ex-Wallflower

May 26th, 2010 by Val Nelson

I just led a networking workshop with this same title the other day and wow, the room was packed with eager folks. I had to turn some people away!

I’ll have to do it again soon. (Sign up here to be notified.)

Clearly there’s a big unmet need for help with networking, especially among introverts who often say they feel like they have to put on an extrovert mask to network. Not true!

In the workshop, I focused on helping introverts bring their authentic selves to networking so they can have more fun, ease, and success with it. I saw lots of aha moments as the participants learned what networking is and isn’t and how it can work for them.

Take-Home Lessons

The best way to capture some of the workshop lessons is to quote some of the participants. (Only used if they gave me permission.)

“It is helpful understanding what networking is. I do like a lot of networking activities and will focus on those.” ~Kim
“I don’t have to be someone I’m not. I can work with who I am.” ~Anonymous
“Find networking opportunities among the things you already enjoy.” ~Anonymous
“Oh right, do what I already enjoy! Duh. I’m going to host a lunch for ladies I like.” ~Lisa
“I’m already networking. I just didn’t realize it!” ~Victoria
“Networking does not = pain and suffering!” ~Mary
“Don’t be pushy. It doesn’t work — what a relief!” ~Anonymous
“One secret to networking is starting in your comfort zone.” ~Christopher
“Networking is just making new friends.” ~Anonymous
“Having lunch with friends is networking!” ~Lori
“I need to articulate why I love what I do in my opening.” ~Carol

Oh, it was so fun reading what everyone learned. Thank you. And thanks for attending and being so engaged in it. You made it fun.

More Resources

These other posts I’ve written also capture some of the key points:

I’d love to hear your thoughts and ideas in the comments section below. Thanks!

Tags: introverts, job search, Networking

Posted in Introvert Power, Networking

Kim

Thank you, Val, for a great workshop. I started reading The Introvert Advantage today. I can't put it down. Making me much more confident about myself, and is filled with suggestions on how to handle very real situations.
http://www.valnelson.com/ Val Nelson

Fantastic Kim! You sure move fast on buying and starting a new book! I'm impressed. I LOVE hearing about the boost in confidence. Yea!
http://www.marymckitrick.com Mary McKitrick

Val, I enjoyed your workshop very much. It reminded me to implement a technique that I discovered back in my days as a biology researcher. If you have any kind of problem or challenge, it's enormously helpful to tell people about it, because solutions might be right in your backyard – that is, in the network that you already have such as friends, family, co-workers and colleagues. And the more enthusiastic you are about it, the more people want to help! For example, the same interesting challenge I mentioned in your workshop? I told a friend about it and she suggested two possibilities I had not thought of that I'm currently pursuing, and they are full of promise.

Life is grand!

Thanks again Val – you are a great resource.
http://www.valnelson.com/ Val Nelson

Oh, what a great tip! Thanks for sharing those specifics and that recent story of how it's helping you specifically.

Start in your own backyard. How often we forget.

Love your website and the voice samples are amazing. Couldn't resist tweeting about it.
http://www.matthewcornell.org/ Matthew Cornell

Cool idea. I have a ton of secrets, mostly gained from 1) being a social introvert, and 2) experimenting and making every mistake in the book.
http://www.valnelson.com/ Val Nelson

Experimenting! That's so key. I love how you created a tool to help people track their life experiments. I'll have to try it out soon: http://edison.thinktrylearn.com/

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